


Without You

by mollydrew



Category: Buttercreams, Joeck - Fandom
Genre: Joeck - Freeform, M/M, buttercreams - Freeform, jaspar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-03
Updated: 2017-01-03
Packaged: 2018-09-14 12:24:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9181456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mollydrew/pseuds/mollydrew
Summary: joe finds himself getting weaker and weaker, drowning his tears in alchohol. When Conor takes him in, he can't seem to get on with his brother Jack. When one night they find themselves closer than ever.





	

"He kicked you out? What do you mean he kicked you out?" Conor raised his voice as he spoke down the phone. It was late and he'd been woken by the ear splitting vibrations coming from his drawer and the bright blurry screen stung his swollen eyes.  
They'd been on the phone for half and hour and Joe's heavy, spaced out breathing hadn't calmed down. You could Joe had been crying, you could tell by his croaky, broken voice and the sniffles he repeated to make. "Look, ah, you can stay with me if you need a place to stay, i'm not having you strung on the streets, no way!" Conor spoke with a calming voice to try and ease Joe's state. It had been 3 months since Caspar's passing, Joe was still coping just as badly as he did when he first found out. He'd barely eaten, his body was weak and he had barely left the pub. The only things he managed to consume was alcohol. Lots of alcohol. His temper had grown more aggressive and he'd rarely speak to his friends any more. They'd have to ring him if they need him, and even then it was a rare chance of them getting an actual answer. He was letting his life grow into nothing, but he couldn't see himself living, breathing air without Caspar being by his side.  
Jack hardly paid any attention, after all it was late and he'd only just got into bed. On hearing Conor say they could stay at his, jacks ears pricked up.  
surely he should get a say? he lived here too, even if he'd only just come back into Conor's life.   
he heard josh stumble from his bed and into the living room, joining Conor.  
"what is it now" josh whispered loudly.  
jack smiled knowing that josh would most likely say no to joe living with them.

"It's joe, graham has kicked him out" Conor said loudly, sensibly he had covered the mic on the phone as he spoke directly to his housemate and very close friend.

Joe.

Jack frowned, he had heard the name a few times before, but actually seen joe even less. He was Conor's best mate and   
had virtually become invisible since jack had come back to London after bumping into Conor quite suddenly after coming off of a high.  
this wasn't exactly how he'd imagined his life to be at 22, but he'd got clean- he was practically forced to- he couldn't exactly start snorting in Conor's front room. His life was completely different now, he had a stable job, thanks to Conor and josh a home, and well- he just wasn't joe. 

He didn't know enough about joes life to judge him, apart from the fact that Conor and josh loved him enough to look past his volatile demeanour. He'd seen the face only a few times, always completely off his face and slurring his words, sitting in his home with josh and a pack of beers.  
jack looked over to Conor, and he could sense the fear and worry in his face, Conor didn't even have to speak.  
after the fourth occurrence of this- jack confronted his sibling- wondering what was wrong with joe.  
it turned out he was messed up. fucked up.   
Jack had missed the part where his boyfriend was in a car accident and joe had to make the decision to turn off his life support. He'd missed all that and was now witnessing joe at his lowest- but jack couldn't help but think what would of been worse to see. 

 

Jack hadn't seen joe for weeks but from what he was hearing- he was just on a continuous downward spiral of self destruction. Jack had heard something a few days ago about joe getting so drunk that he'd smashed up his room so he guessed that's why he'd been kicked out. He couldn't feel sorry for him, he didn't know him enough to feel anything other than a slight dislike...he wanted to keep that distance as there was no way he wanted to be carrying the worry that josh and Conor both shared for joe.

"yeah no- look you come and stay with me alright" Conor said  
woah no. That caused jack to move closer to the door.

"Conor, is this really the best idea?" Josh questioned, good ol josh pointing out the cracks in the plan, jack smiled slightly at this, yet he was now standing with the door half open.

"Yeah look I'll-we'll see you later okay, alright mate bye" Conor hastily hung up the phone.

"Well thanks for letting me have a say" josh said rolling his eyes " and what about jack"  
Jack smiled.   
"Doesn't he get a say?"  
Jack didn't see why he wouldn't, after all he paid rent, he cooked sometimes and he did most of the cleaning.

"Josh it's our house- he's just our lodger" Conor replied 

that was it. Jack flung open the door and raced down the stairs to face Conor and josh.   
"Yeah he should get a say actually" jack said clearly annoyed  
"My mate crashing on MY sofa for a few days has nothing to do with you" Conor continued

Jack rolled his eyes " well it does if he's unstable"

"UNSTABLE" Conor yelled " he isn't unstable he's grieving"

Jack shook his head " I get that Conor, trust me I really do, but he can't just go around smashing things up just because he's having a rough time of it" instantly regretting the way he was taking about it 

Conor shook his head " well the next time you have to turn of your boyfriends life support, I'll make sure that I monitor your upset and I'll be this understanding"

Jack was seething. He exited the room and went back to bed.

hours had passed and jack still hadn't slept, the constant thought of his own last struggles overpowering his mind. 

At around 3am he heard the front door slam shut. Joe had arrived. Of course he was intrigued. He hadn't seen the guy for a while. He tried to ignore the sound of the guest moving around downstairs but something kept telling him he should go and check on him.   
Quietly he opened his bedroom door and crept down the stairs.  
as he was about to enter the living room, he saw joe, curled up on the sofa, a pack of beers on the table, but he was crying.   
that got jack. He felt somewhat sympathetic for joe. WHY. he knew he shouldn't feel like that, but he couldn't help it.  
suddenly he felt joes eyes on him.  
"Getting a good look at the freak show are we" joe spat, the drink taking over his body.  
"What- erm no- I just came to get a drink" jack said quickly, his words jumbling. He pulled the door shut and ran back upstairs.  
As soon as he reached his bed, he completely broke down and pulled his knees to his chest and cried himself to sleep.


End file.
